Some art forms emphasize subtlety and nuance, the idea that you can most effectively communicate an idea by giving the viewer only the bare minimum of information and then letting his brain do the real work. The marketing department at Alfa Romeo scoffs at your high-mindedness.

Take this advertisement for the 4C, for example. It starts out like your typical car commercial -- slow-mo shots of the vehicle in perfect lighting, adoring images of the black-leather-clad interior, the sound of the engine revving, etc. But before too long, it gets to the damn point: driving an Alfa Romeo is exactly the same thing as sex.

"To move a man's spirit, we deal in the realm of sensation," says the narrator: cue shot of woman's sheer dress fluttering just above her bare knees and below her black panties, with a man lying in wait before her. "Passions" leads to a shot of pre-coital action, complete with back and neck licking. Just after the minute mark, we get a none-too-subtle visual connection between the shape of the car's top and a woman's back side.

Now, we're not saying this sort of thing is cheap -- it's all very nice and expensive-looking -- but the old "buying this product will get you laid" trope is as old as advertising itself. Nice try, Alfa Romeo. If you really want to grab our attention, include some nipple next time. Till then, we'll stick with our Lamborghinis.

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