The first clip from Lifetime's The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story has hit the web, and it is some rullll uncanny valley shit. We see Dylan Everett as Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Zack), Sam Kindseth as Dustin Diamond (Screech), Julian Works as Mario Lopez (Slater), Alyssa Lynch as Tiffani-Amber Thiessen (Kelly), Tiera Skovbye as Elizabeth Berkley (Jessie), and Taylor Russell McKenzie as Lark Voorhies (Lisa), looking very much like the real stars, and conveying about as much acting skill as the original series.

The scene features the fake SBTB cast during a photo shoot for the soon-to-be-iconic show, and as Bell Biv DeVoe's classic "Poison" plays, the fictionalized cast-mates unleash enough passive-aggressive cattiness to stretch all the way to Valley. Friends Forever my ass.

Tune in for The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story on September 1 at 9 p.m. on Lifetime.